disappointment is a word i know too well.

fuck, i honestly don't want to do anything tomorrow. no homework, no going outside. i just wanna confine myself in my room and either sleep or watch the OC.

i am thankful for the friends and family that i have.

When winter falls next year, I'll be holding on to anything nailed down.

this isn't who i am, from confidence to self doubt in sixty seconds.

note to self

dont ever clean macbook keyboard again.

my "y" and "i" keys were going fucking haywire a second ago.

seems like they're okay now.

y i y i y i y i y i y i y i y i y i

a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x y z

y i y i y i y i

fuck this is depressing

I'm sitting in the back of my jeep in the school parking lot waiting to go to work so I can finish up the second part of my split shift.

I just want to be home, or even near home.


best Sunday night ever.

shitty feeling

when people move on with their lives, like i meant nothing to them.

recent events in my life have led me to relate to this stupid tumblr meme. 

now thinking hurts, and feeling is worse.

keeping warm by the light of a television, in an empty room, in an
emptier life. making promises to myself. trying to validate myself. 

i will be neck deep in sitcoms, school projects, and work this veterans day weekend.

Stress

Since this semester had started back in August/September, my life has been this crazy whirlwind of school, work, interning, commuting, sitting in traffic, girl, friends, lack of sleep, lack of time, lack of money, midterms, and nagging parents.

Last semester, I only took about 4 classes (actually I only took 3), and now I’m taking 5, make that 6 if you count my internship, and I’m working at Best Buy. I seriously spoiled myself last year. I did less than the bare minimum and so now the normal school load seems like way too much. 

I’m sure some people have it worse though. I hope not. No one should be commuting an hour+ to work and school. It’s pretty depressing. I kind of lost it earlier today. My feelings have been so volatile this past week and especially today. 

i have never felt this kind of stress and anxiety before in my life.